It is so hard to feel powerless when it comes to ones child hurting. My heart goes out to you. 13 is not an easily convinced age. Typically a young lady is self critical and the harshest critic, she has.What if you were to get her set up with a personal trainer or in an exercise group of her peers with weight problems? I might also suggest offering her a make over on her hair and makeup and style. But you really need to be careful in how you word it. Speaking in I statements usually works best such as: Honey when I don t feel real good about myself, it has helped me to get my hair done. I am about due. Would you like to get yours done too? And hey we could even go to Nordstroms and get a free make up make over and then go shopping or to a natural food restaurant and see what the food is like. What do you say? It will be a chic date!Change the family diet by shopping for healthy snack food like grapes other fruit and raisens. Don t keep chips, ice cream and other fat foodt in the house. It is too hard to be singled out and watch the family enjoy food you can t eat. Maybe sign up for a mom-daughter, cooking class that would get her interested in menu planning and meal creation. Let her cook with you. There are plenty of healthy recipes on the internet and you can make some superb ,tasty, salads and fruit concoctions as well as lean meat dishes. Try not to think DIET. Rather, think and talk in life changes terms. The best way to help is to join your daughter on her quest. Enroll in a swimming class with her, a gym you can both work out in, like CURVES, or set aside a day each week for bike riding, playing tennis or another activity., commit to a daily half hour walk with your daughter. To keep it interesting drive to other neighborhoods, the beach, downtown, a ritzy neighborhood or the zoo for your walks.Don t overly praise her. Absolutely don t criticize her and when she manages to do something well, positive for her health and goals, give her kudos without over statement.. God bless you. I hope this is helpful. Hang in there mom. She will be okay as long as she feels your supportive love and its obvious you are supportive and love her.
I always found working out in a gym helped me.Seeing the dedication and the love for the work out and yet seeing how many nice people you can meet.Working out made me feel alot better I was big for a while.Get family members and friends to say God *insert name* have you lost like 20 thirty pounds you look great.Tell her everytime she loses weight she can sell her bigger clothes on ebay or craigslist and you and her will go on a shopping spree of sorts to congradulate her and spend a little extra on her and say because you deserve it honey. Try making small meals for her.Everybody on a diet makes it seem more normal.Might relax her mind about health issues in the house.Going on nightly walks to talk and go for a good hour.Talk about how you see a big change in her form from fat to muscle.Tell her to notice her cheek bones the more weight she loses the thinner her face will get.Make a calender mark big weight loss amounts and then at the end of the month see who lost the most weight in the family that person gets taken out to a movie and you can bring trail mix and water and make it a healthy and fun night.Bring a BIG purse and load it with healthy things.Remind her how common this is.Print out pictures of bigger girls(plus size models)Make a scrap book and show her how beauty is just the same at any weight but healthy is whats important.Talk to her about health risks explain this is the only reason you want her to diet.No more pop not even diet water water water she will feel better and look it.Invite couples over who have children.Have them all go on a nature hike.Bring healthy snacks.make a day out of walking or jogging all day.Dad and you walk around town with her try staying out longer and longer till you spent all weekend just out seeing the neighborhood.Or the neighborhood trials.Encourage her to go to the pool ymca offers great programs very cheap.Try going biking or just play some tennis in the back yard a little family baseball anything works.Just get up and active with her.
Honestly, any compliment you give her will make her feel you re only saying it because you have to. Mom s are supposed to think they re kid is good looking, smart, cool, etc. You re doing the right thing though, you support her, you re there for her, and anything she needs you will do. THAT is what matters the most. Not that you believe shes getting thinner or prettier, but that if she doesn t you re there. If she needs help reaching her goal, you re there. The fact is, only she can motivate herself to lose weight. Of course she wants to, but its hard, its fighting hunger and desire.I d ask her what she wants you to do. She might want you to be really strict, not let her eat bad food. She might not want any help from you, but you need to be there when she does, no questions asked. I really admire you for being so active in her life and really wanting to do the right thing.
