Question Details: My Mom died 9 years ago in August, and I have put on weight since then. I was thin until she died because she would watch me like a hawk, and since she is no longer around to watch me, I eat like there is no tomorrow.I want to figure out how to lose weight without someone looking over my shoulder. I used to hate her nagging, but I needed it, and miss my Mom so much.
One of the problems of losing weight is the brain...The brain is very clever and if it thinks you have lost something it will do its best to find it again for you. In the case of losing weight this is the last thing you want. You don t want the brain to slow your metabolism down so that you find your lost weight. What can you do about this? talk about your weight differently. If you are 20 stone and you want to be lighter, start off by telling yourself that you are 19 stone 12 and have gained 2 pounds (this will eventually get your brain to start trying to get rid of the extra for you) Remember though, if you don t believe it, it wont work (your brain is clever). lets face it, it is true...you do have extra pounds, so y do we start talking about losing weight? we are just getting back to normal weight.As to eating like there is no tomorrow......well that is your choice. If you eat too much you will put on weight. You are bound to miss your mum, and maybe you haven t dealt with all the issues of loss yet and that makes it more difficult,. Maybe you think that if you start watching your own weight it s as though you have forgotton your mum. Only you can answer those sorts of things. You know best about yourself. What about if you wrk out how long you would have to walk for or run or swim or something else to work off that bar of chocolate? maybe that way you could work off the calories BEFORE you eat them. If a bar of chocolate is half hour wal then do the walk before you eat it. (You might not want to eat it and spoil all your hard work that way, so you win both ways)Whatever you do, be happy.
You are welcome! I agree with your husband, I did the same with smoking as well, it really does work. (You do have to believe what you are saying though) Report Abuse
Well to be brutally honest there is a psychological factor, and saying that your mom is all that stopped you from gaining weight is an excuse to avoid accepting that you can t stop your own eating. In which case I recommend you first accept yourself (Seeing a counsellor or psychologist is nothing to be ashamed of if it can help you feel better) and then get comfort in the idea your mother loved you and then work to losing weight by trying to eat smaller balanced meals more regularly and possibly going to see a trainer (certified of course) to help you reach your weight lose goals. And maybe a dietician for help with meal planning and such. Sorry if I came on strong I m just trying to help
I did the same after my mum passed, comfort eating, all the bad things are the tastiest because they are full of salt and sugar and your body get s addicted without you knowing. I m doing weight watchers diet it s the only one that works for me, having a daily points allowance and writing down everything you eat will put it into prespective. If you only have say 20 points for the day and a chocolate biscuit is 2 points you will realise how much you are eating and snacking throughout the day without realising. You can do it online it is cheaper than the meetings, or go once get all the start up books and do it alone. Once you get into it and the weight starts to come off it gives you more confidence. Good luck.
I m really sorry to hear about your mom firstly - I imagine you do miss her very much, and I do agree with you that a lot of issues surrounding weight is psychological. It sounds like you may be comfort eating more than anything. The main thing is that you ve realised you re over-eating, and now you can do something about it. I don t think you need anyone to tell you how to eat. Everyone knows that a healthy balance of excercise and smaller food portions is the best way. Try not to miss out meals either. I m sure you have a good idea of which foods are bad for you and which are good. By eating lots of fruit and veg, it should help improve your moods and outlooks on things too. I ve put on about 2 stone myself over the last couple of years, since I met my future husband! - but that s my thing, I always lose weight with unhappiness, and gain when I feel settled and happy! So I have some weight to lose myself!! Keep your chin up -I m certain things will get easier for you in time.Good luck
Of course it has a psychological aspect, it s not called comfort eating for nothing! We need to want to lose weight for ourselves though, someone else nagging is not going to work, my wife tells me that (and yes, I do need to lose weight!), so I am really trying to diet, although she does help (I m not married long, so obviously I try harder).The point remains though, that we are fat because we eat and drink too much, and until we indulge less, we will stay fat or indeed put more on!If only it were that simple in practice!
I am not sure if this is the kind of thing that you are looking for but this is what has helped me to lose weight. It s a website. This is 100% free. You put in how much you are trying to lose, and by when and it will tell you how many calories you would have to eat per day. It will give you a workout routine if you want one and if you don t it will tell you how many calories you would have to eat without exercise and still lose the weight. Although, keep in mind that exercixe will help it to come off faster. Plus the website offers meal plans too.This is a website that has helped me to lose weight (34 lbs. since Jan. 08). I could have actually lost more but I have been slacking a lot. It allows you to create a blog, keep track of what you ve eaten, and your fitness. Along with some other things.It is kind of set up like myspace if you are familiar with that, but it is only for weight loss. It is www.SparkPeople.com, and if you decide to do it you can tell them I sent you or stop by my page, my name there is Tryin2Lose2
Breezer - I miss my mom every day. She passed away 3 years ago. I left home back in 1974 and have never lived with my family since..... But I was always a mamma s boy. Anyways, back to the weight situation..... Now that we are on our own we are the ones that need to take control. I say smaller portions.... and snack, if you must, with fruit, raw veggies and water. But, it s the smaller portions that you ll have to get used to. You ll see that after not long you ll get used to it.
Sorry about mum...yes,weight gain is an emotional stuff...to lose fat is the same for all- good combination of cardio toning exercises added with a portion controlled diet...
